Here's the main stuff we addressed:
I let my therapist know that the "same issues" were bothering me; my caregiver, my wife, my dad, money issues. And feeling neglected. We talked about how these things are unlikely to change globally for many reasons, and that it seems like there's this vicious cycle that always ends up frustrating me and messing with my quality of life. My therapist was stressing that "accepting" these things is not healthy or necessary b/c I deserve to speak my mind and influence changes. And my therapist does think things can change on a minutiae level. For example, if I would like more or less company, or need a particular type of food, or other specific things, that can likely be taken care of. It's just the global stuff (e.g. that I am not in direct control of my own money) that is unlikely to change.
So, as opposed to "accepting," my therapist was suggesting "adapting" to the situation. The goal of this would be to roll with the stuff that can't change, focus on the stuff you can change, and thus not get so frustrated. So, for example, if my casita is not livable while the renovation workers put in the floors, and I feel trapped by your other choices, I can calmly discuss things with my wife and/or my therapist to come up with an arrangement. This would help them, help me. This would be as opposed to getting so angry and frustrated over the fact that I have to have this discussion in the first place! When this happens, it makes it harder for my medical team to help me.
I also discussed how difficult it is to communicate, mainly b/c my mind goes faster than I can verbally get the ideas out. This may be why it's so upsetting when things aren't going the way I'd like; b/c it presents a situation in which you need to communicate. My therapist wonders if I become afraid I won't get your point across, and thus it comes out in a way that makes it seem like you're angry with my wife, etc.